Tuesday, January 02, 2007

When I was growing up one of my favorite book characters was Anastasia Krupnik because she was the only person I knew who loved lists as much as I did

Lately I've noticed a rash of people refusing to make New Year's Resolutions because they say they are bound to break them right away anyway. Which seems silly to me. Because I could care less whether I keep any of my New Year's Resolutions, the real truth is that I just love love love to make lists. Because I am just THAT type of loser I always carry around a little notebook with me and I make lists in it constantly and then cross things off the lists and then rewrite the lists when they get messy and then update the lists and then cross reference the lists and sometimes I even write things I have already done onto the lists just so I can have the satisfaction of crossing them off. In fact some of the times I have been most annoyed with Mr. E are the times he has disrespected both the sanctity and the neatness of some list of mine and scrawled something like "31. Put Out" at the bottom of one of my to do lists or written "balls" on a grocery list. He finds it very amusing and looks on in confusion and awe of the wonder that is me when I angrily tell him that it's all very funny in his world I know but now the damn list will just have to be rewritten.
Anyway. Here is my list of resolutions for the year, some of which I am telling you now, I WILL do, come hell or high water, and some of which I will merely strive to achieve, with no guarantees.

1. I would like to write more, and read more.
2. I need to drink way way way more water, and I'm going to accomplish this by making sure I always have a full glass of water with me.
3. I would like to talk less shit. And complain less about people. I mean, after all, we're all just doing the best we can.
4. This is the year that Mr. E and are going to get our financial shit under control, no matter what. It's got to be done.
5. When we have been here for one year (in June) I am going to start going back to school.
6. I would like to run the San Jose Rock and Roll half marathon, so I resolve to train for that, and also I'd like to lose the weight I have gained while being pregnant by the end of the year. But at the same time, I'd like to try to hang onto some of my new insights I've gained this year, and stay rational about weight loss. I look at pictures of myself from this summer and I think "holy shit. I thought I was fat? I was out of my mind." and I think about how much time I spent thinking about all the food I wanted to eat but wouldn't let myself and I think something was a little off there. So I don't want to go back to that place, if I can help it.
7. I will finally finally finally get my drivers license.
8. I would like to concentrate more on being a good, fun, healthy and happy mom and less on buying things for the baby. I don't think he'll care if he has 4 hoodie towels instead of 5. And while I would feel better if I knew everything was all taken care of, if I could walk in to the nursery and see a rocker all ready to go and everything that a baby could ever need set up and if everything was decorated just as I wish it were, I don't think that's ultimately what's going to make me a good mom, and it's definitely not a requirement for bringing home a healthy baby. So I need to tone down the baby consumerism freak out a little.
9. I will decide if I want to return contact with my father.
10. And I will decide if I actually some sort of medically treated issue like the Social Anxiety Disorder I have self diagnosed myself with and if think I need to do something about it or ask for help I will.

1 comment:

PastaQueen said...

I am a list addict too. Have you ever seen Ta-da Lists? I might be introducting you to crack here, but you can make lists at that site, check them off, reorganize them, and undelete items. It's awesome.